Saying Goodbye

This week marked the beginning of a big change: I shared with my partners, team and patients that I will close my practice at the end of November. Our youngest child is a senior, and the nest will be empty soon. My work in value-based care will generously allow me the flexibility to travel while working. The COVID pandemic has been difficult for healthcare workers everywhere; it certainly contributed to my decision to take a break from clinical medicine. For all these reasons, the timing is right to make a career change to administrative medicine.

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First Light

I went back to running outside this week as the weather in Kansas turned to spring. I am a planner by nature, so I always check on various must-haves before venturing out: temperature (which ranged from 80 degrees to snow this week!), wind (anything less than 10 mph is golden, up to 20 mph is tolerable), when the sun comes up and how much time that leaves me post-run before I need to be ready to roll for the day. I prefer to run at first light, in those perfect moments before the sun is above the horizon. Some days all the details line up, other days I head to the treadmill in my basement. Today was one of the perfect days: temperature low 40’s, wind speed 7 mph, sunrise 7:04am.

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Past Time

Today is Saturday, November 21, 2020. It feels as if 2020 has gone on a very long time and we haven’t even had Thanksgiving yet. It feels past time for this year to be over, if only it would carry the pandemic away with it. I feel this way; I hear my family, friends, teammates and patients voice this sentiment; no doubt many people are tired of 2020 all over Rooks County, in Kansas, across the United States and the world. Before this pandemic can end, though, some things need to happen, and we all need to pitch in to help.

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Speaking the Language

I am a data geek. Turn me loose with a huge spreadsheet, chock-full of information, and I can entertain myself for hours. The day I learned about pivot tables changed my life forever. (If you, too, are a data geek, this statement will resonate with your soul.) And my all-time favorite thing to do with a big pile of data is to translate it into pictures (graphs) that more clearly explain the story contained in all of those numbers and allow people to take action based on that information. In a way, this mirrors my love for medicine: take a large amount of information (a person’s history, physical exam, maybe some lab data), look at it from all sides, and translate it into a diagnosis (story) and action (a plan to make the patient healthier).

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Lessons from a Pandemic

I tell my children that they will be able to share firsthand stories with their children and grandchildren about a significant piece of history: the pandemic in their lifetime. It gives me perspective for this very interesting time in my own life and helps me slow down and appreciate all that is happening and everything I am learning. COVID19 has made a big impression: in 2020, in the world, in the US, in Kansas, in the healthcare community, in my own work, family and life. Some changes are negative (fear, economic impact, morbidity and mortality). And some are positive. Those useful changes are the ones I am working to recognize, learn from and pivot toward in the longer-term.

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Gratitude Once More

As an early career family physician, I was blessed with three incredible mentors. From these family docs, I learned the science of medicine, and more importantly, I realized the necessity of practicing the art. I’ve been working on sharing my gratitude with those who make my life better on the regular, so I’m taking time to say thanks to those who shared so much with me and helped “grow me up” to be the family physician I am.

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The Space Between the Dots

Things are different when you live half-way between Kansas City and Denver. You can’t pop down the street to a great Ethiopian restaurant or head to the mega-mall for a last minute Christmas gift, for example. And there is no anonymity; news in a small community travels quickly, and everyone is part of the community. The line between patient and friend rarely exists. My home address and phone number are in the phonebook; it wouldn’t matter if they were unlisted because everyone knows where I live anyway. And I’m good with that fact.

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