Apples and Trees — Ad Astra per Aspera

Chris and I took up tennis recently — or rather, we are laughing our way through learning to hit a tennis ball back and forth across the net and land it anywhere close to inbounds — and I hurt my finger last time we played. As I nursed it back to health, I thought of my dad. He would often have various injuries and wait to seek treatment: once, a broken arm that he was “careful of” for six weeks until it felt better (he didn’t want a cast, which would impede motorcycle riding) and once, a more serious subdural hematoma (bleeding in the skull which puts pressure on the brain) that required emergency surgery when several weeks after an accident he could no longer walk properly. I had to chuckle as I caught myself wondering if my finger was broken and deciding to go the route of taking ibuprofen and waiting a few days before checking with my family doc. “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree,” definitely describes me.

My dad has been on my mind a lot lately, all good stuff. I’m happy to finally have reached the “more smiles than tears” stage; it took me a few years (In Your Own Time). When something happens that I know would tickle dad’s funny bone, it makes me crack up to remember him laughing so hard that at times, he couldn’t talk. When I have to avert my eyes during an emotional scene in a movie, I know I inherited that behavior from him. (He once got up and left the theater entirely during a particularly heart-wrenching moment!) When I catch a glance of my tattoo, I connect back to the strength of his love for me, and I am filled with joy. The legacy of his life formed a strong foundation for my own.

I love that my own family tree has three pretty amazing “apples” who fell close. I suppose it is fairly common that parents look for ways their children take after them. When qualities like bravery, curiosity and kindness, all traits I aspire to exemplify, show up in my kids’ actions, I am delighted. And when one or the other of them does or says something that is exactly like I would have done or said it…well, it’s like sparklers are lighting up my heart. I can only imagine my dad must have felt the same way about me.

When I look at Jacob, Paul and Maggie, I see my grandfather’s ornery smile, my grandmother’s sharp wit and dry humor, my dad’s desire to connect people, my mom’s love for all, my husband’s intelligence and curiosity, and my own ambitious desire to change the world around me. These attributes are beautifully blended with characteristics from other branches on our family tree and create a delicious combination in each of them. It is so very good when apples don’t fall far from their trees.